Monday, November 7, 2011

Plus-Sized Skinny Jeans?

            To the large middle-aged man in Wal-mart walking around in skinny jeans,
I think you may have exceeded the limits of your pants…by just a hair.
Sincerely, girl who now wishes she were blind.        

            I have recently been inspired to write about something I view as a serious problem in our society: the use and misuse of skinny jeans. Let’s face it. Only a fraction of the world’s population can pull it off. And that does NOT include guys. If you are a guy and you wear skinny jeans, you BETTER be holding a gun or hunting velociraptors or otherwise doing something incredibly manly for every second of your life. Now, I’m not trying to be mean, but it’s just not okay. If I were a blind person, by all means, wear whatever pleases you. Except I’m not blind, and if I happen to glance at you and see something I will never be able to un-see, then we have a problem. Do the sighted world a favor…Please. Wear what fits you. I can promise that you’ll feel better about yourself, people around you will be more comfortable, and you won’t lose circulation in your legs…I give such great advice, huh? You’re welcome. :)  


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